The Sea Never Left Me
by madasmonty
Summary: "His voice was from a different life. He had promised me everything: The whole of the sea, a lifetime of adventure. Then he had stolen it all away in a flick and dived off into the depths of the ocean. I was left without anyone..." Oneshot. Please r


The Sea Never Left Me

"Sapphire…" A voice from long ago whispered its way into the tangled web of my dreams.

I turned away. His voice was from a different life. He had promised me everything: The whole of the sea, a lifetime of adventure. Then he had stolen it all away in a flick and dived off into the depths of the ocean. I was left without anyone and with Conor away living with his new girlfriend Julia, I had no one to confide in.

The dream version of myself walked away from the boy-from-the-pasts' voice. I walked and walked and…

I was suddenly falling! I fell down into the deep, dark, cold sea.

"Remember me!" A sharp voice snapped into my mind. Faro. "We had such adventures together: The Guardian Seals, The Crossing of Ingo, the battle with Ervys!" As he spoke fantasy seals, imaginary polar bears and Mer from my memories swam round me. "Little sister, you must never leave Ingo!"

The use of the words 'Little sister' made something whip inside me. Until then he'd been saying the words to me without giving me a choice whether or not to listen. He'd lowered the guard and called me a name that had made me trust and care for him.

I was suddenly yelling. "I. Am. Not. Your. LITTLE SISTER!"

Fire bloomed in the sea. A tongue of flame that smelt of grass and hay and was accompanied by the sound of dogs barking and children laughing appeared around me. Fire burned in water. The fire spoke of Air and Earth and all things that were the opposite of Ingo. Faro, whom had never laid eyes of fire before but had only heard tales of it, darted away in fright.

The flame disappeared and I was left floating in the sea. Faro swam cautiously back over to me. He was unsure of how I would act. There was an expression on his face I had never seen before: Apprehension.

"Faro," I sneered at him, "The great and mighty, infallible Faro: Scared by a bit of fire!"  
"Sapphire-" Faro began, but I cut him off.

"You always were the leader of our group. Elvira was the quiet healer. But she turned didn't she? She abandoned you for a wild life in the North! As for Conor, well…You never truly clicked with Conor. The testosterone between you two was immense! And where is he now? Living with his girlfriend Julia! He's moved on. Elvira has left you. So it look like it's just you and me _brother_!" I said the last word sarcastically.

Faro didn't shout as I expected him to. He didn't get all high and mighty about being Mer. He just looked at me with such utter pity that a fresh wave of loathing fell over me.

"Sapphire," He whispered, "I didn't mean to leave you. I got lost and managed to find my way back to Ingo. I regret it every day that I left you alone in The Deep."  
I glared at him; "I could've died down there! What did you say? 'Oh why don't we go to The Deep?' I didn't want to! But I was so brainwashed by you that I followed like a little lost lamb! Then we got 'separated'! Please! You didn't even come to look for me again! You just thought you'd use you oh-so-powerful Mer abilities to find your way back home! Well good for you! You left the stupid Mer-Human in the Deep as good as dead. I managed to find my way out, though. Like you'd care!"  
"I do care Sapphire," Faro said in a pained voice. His face was etched with misery. "I think about you every day! You mean so much to me. We aren't blood-related but we're as good as. The wild waters of Ingo run through our veins. We have a connection that is as deep as the darkest chasm of the sea, as strong as the hull of a human-metal ship, as wild as the grip of the Kraken."

"If you care about me so much why'd you leave me?" I asked in a sharp tone.

"I didn't mean to. I…I was scared. So scared Sapphire. I know you know how I felt. The paranoia gripped my soul and I only swam half as fast as usual. It was like a black stain on me. Like a leech draining out all my life. Like a-"Again I cut him off.

"Cut the similes. I asked you why you left me not a comprehensive work of Shakespeare!"

Faro looked confused, of course he didn't know who Shakespeare was, but he continued. "When I finally escaped I was so pleased that I admit my first thought was not on you but telling Saldowr."  
"Saldowr is but a bag of bones in the ground!" I answered him, curtly.

"I spoke to his gravestone. I am sure he could hear me. Saldowr would not want us to fight over something so trivial. We are brother and sister. We both are part Mer and part human. We have _deubleks_."  
I looked at him. I looked down at the last link between Ingo and me. The bracelet made of mine and Faro's hair entwined so tightly that you couldn't tell where my hair began and his ended.

It bound us as one. Its very being spoke of love, friendship and trust. It reminded me of all we had had together and all that could be.

And I hated it.

"We are NOT brother and sister anymore!" I cried and snapped the _deublek_.

As I flew away from the dream world of Ingo and headed back for my bed, the last thing I heard was Faro screaming "Sapphire!"

I sat bolt upright in bed. I was freezing cold and yet burning. The dream had elated me. At last I had told Faro my true feelings and I was happy.

I pretended not to notice the sadness I felt in the back of my mind. I chose to ignore the tiny part of me that called out to Ingo in longing.

Faro's pleading voice and sad face echoed in my mind as a shout lingers in a cave.

Shout…Faro shouting…Pleading with me…

No! I mustn't think of that. I had to visit Conor and tell him what had happened. Despite my deepest will wishing it hadn't, the meeting with Faro had reopened a wound that had long ago healed. Ingo knew I had met with one of its children and would begin to call to me again.

I walked downstairs and did the mundane chore of eating cereal and then got dressed. As I washed myself the sound of the water running made me think of waves.

Waves crashing…Dolphins leaping…Mer laughing…Freedom…

But I could not think of Ingo! Faro was gone. I had spoken to him so harshly that he would never even think of me again. He would dismiss me as a childish playmate as I had him.

For some reason that hurt me. I seemed to find to OK when I criticised and ignored Faro but just the thought of him doing the same made me feel sick.

I got on the 182 bus to Ogni Street, where Conor lived, via Oraf Crescent and Arivle Avenue. As I looked up at the names of the streets the bus went through I was bewildered by the sheer irony. Ogni was Ingo spelt backward. Oraf was Faro spelt backwards and Arivle backward spelt Elvira. Even when I wasn't in Ingo it still slithered its way into my life and reminded me painfully of what I had left.

Unwillingly my thoughts turned back to Ingo. There was one particular time that I loved for its innocence and serenity…

Faro and I were bathing in the sun-water. The light of the sun, reflected off the deep blue sea that ensconced the silvery white sand beneath, cast an iridescent luminescence that accentuated the seas mysterious and almost ethereal quality. I was completely at peace and calm. Nothing could harm me and Faro and I were totally alone. Maybe, by sheer will I could return to that time and stay there forever. I was so nearly there…

"Hello Sapphire!" Cried a familiar and yet at this time unwelcome voice. It was my friend Rainbow.

"Hi Rainbow," I said with a false smile. I was so nearly there in the sun-water! If she hadn't interrupted me I could have made it there and become encased in the memory and lost in the happiness.

"I'm on my way to ride Treacle." She said, "You know my friend Kylie's horse? Well I've just began to jump now and it's actually easier than it looks! I love horses."  
_Of course you do,_ I thought, _you love horses and dogs and fire and everything that is Air and Earth. You probably don't have a drop of Mer blood in you. You have you feet firmly planted and never heard the irresistible call of the sea. You never will and I pity and envy you for that. _

"Oh, well, this is as near to Kylie's house as I'll get. I'll have to walk the rest. See you later Sapphire." She hurried off the bus. She seemed eager to get away. Maybe she sensed my pensive and sullen mood? Rainbow always had a kind of sixth sense for emotions. It didn't really matter. What did matter was getting Conors advice on my new escapade with Ingo.

I reached Conors house and rang the doorbell. Julia answered, wearing a towel on her head and eating an apple.

"Oh," She said, surprised, "Hey Sapphire. Come in!"  
I walked down the hall and into the living room.

Conor sat reading _The Times_. This was such a typical fatherly thing to do that I was surprised my brother wasn't smoking a pipe to cap it all off!

I coughed and his head shot up.

"Hello Sapphire!" He said happy to see me.

"Hey, Conor," I answered, "Listen, I need to talk to you." I glanced at Julia, "Alone," I added.

Conor got the message of what this was about. He knew I had come to talk about something _other_.

"Julia, why don't you make Sapphire some tea?" He commanded her. Julia left sulkily and I quickly recounted my story to Conor.

He looked slightly stunned for a moment then he said:

"You ripped your bracelet off in his face?"

I nodded.

Conor stared at me for a short while in what looked like shock but could have been sadness or even disgust.

He stood up suddenly and went over to the cupboard with glass doors on it. He motioned for me to come too.

As I arrived I knew immediately what he was showing me.

The cabinet was full of mermaid and merman related objects: A plastic mermaid sat coming her hair, a painting of a mermaid and merman swimming together stood at the back of the case, a childish hairbrush with the word 'mermaid' encrusted on it in jewels sat in there. Prize of the collection though was a wooden necklace. It wasn't as fancy as the hairbrush and certainly not as expensive as the painting but I knew it held the most sentimental value. It was a wooden mermaid with her arms above her head and her tail curled as if she was swimming. The mermaid on the necklace had a small hole in her head and through that threaded a black thread that Conor had worn for ages. It had no face although for a long time Conor had been convinced it looked like his Mer love Elvira. But then Elvira had left Conor for the North and Conor had moved on.

"What does Julia have to say about the merman/maid fixation then?" I asked him, any other time I would have been amused but this was serious. Conor had never really let go of Ingo as I had. Then again, had I let Ingo go or had a roughly pushed it away?

"I told Julia it was just a hobby of mine. She thinks I'm a bit crackers but she's OK with it."

I smiled though it held no joy.

When Conor spoke next he sounded like an aged scholar, not my older brother.

"I've never returned to Ingo. It brings painful memories of Dad but I kept a piece of it in my own way. You had a piece of Ingo straight from its heart. You've torn it away now. Ripped it apart in front of the very person who made it with you and guided you through Ingo and took you on adventures. The _deublek_ is floating away now in the corners of your Ingo dream world."  
I suddenly felt awful. I felt as if a part of my soul had been ripped apart and torn to shreds. Faro's awful heart-wrenching cry rang in my ears.

Faro.

For the first time in months the name held hope.

Faro. Faro. Oh, Faro how could I have ever left you? Faro I'm so, so sorry!

"I-I have to go," I stuttered apologetically.

Conor nodded and smiled at me like he understood.

I ran out of the house and down the road.

I ran smack into Granny Carne.

"My child, where are you going?" She asked sternly. She knew I had turned away from Ingo and the Mer. She wasn't angry with me but she wasn't exactly pleased either. "You have the look of Ingo written all over you!"

"I'm meeting an old friend," I answered, smiling. Then I ran all the way down the road and towards the sea and Ingo…

Once I'd arrived at the beach I dived down into the water. My mind was thinking only of Ingo.

But there was something in the water that hated me. I remembered this happening before when Ervys and his followers tried to keep us from Ingo. The water had become a Porth Cas. We'd battled through it then and so I had to try. But I couldn't breathe. The water was a stormy presence all around me. I had to get out!  
As I took my first breath I realised what hated me in the water. Faro. After what I'd said and done I wasn't surprised. Although there was another way I could meet him and apologise… in my dreams.

I ran back home as fast as I could. I had to say sorry before it was too late and the wounds were too deep to be healed.

I met Mum on the stairs.

"Hello Sapphy, where've you been?" Mum asked,

"I went to see Conor. Julia made tea. But now I'm really exhausted. I think I'll just go to my room." I scuttled past her and headed quickly for my room.

I lay in bed and mumbled 'go to sleep' over and over. I suddenly remembered a trick my friend Rainbow had taught me. I had to clear my mind.

Clear my mind…

Clear…

Sleep…

I don't know when, precisely, I fell asleep but all at once I was in Ingo. Faro sat with his back to me.

I swam up to him, tentatively.

"Go away!" He croaked in an injured voice. It was obvious he had been crying.

I had caused his sadness and injury. I felt terrible.

"Faro, it's me," I whispered, hardly daring to hope that he would even look at me.

Faro turned slowly and looked at me with curiosity and hostility.  
"What are you doing in Ingo?" He spat, "I threw all the hatred I feel for you out in case you tried to come here and hurt me even more. The water became a true Porth Cas. How did you get here? You don't deserve Ingo's love!"  
"I know," I said, feeling wretched, "I entered in my dreams as I did last time. Faro…I'm so sorry!" These small words did not cover how awful I felt. "I've ignored Ingo and turned away from you even when you were my guide and friend and brother. I threw away all the happiness and trust we had just for one silly misunderstanding. Please, if one good thing happens for the rest of my life let it be that you forgive me for acting like a fool."

He looked at me as if he was nervous of me. He slowly began to get up. I could tell he'd been sitting down for a while, as he looked stiff.

Suddenly he smiled, it was as warm as the sun, "Hello little sister! What took you so long?"  
I didn't actually know how much Faro's forgiveness meant to me until he forgave me. Pleasure burst inside me. I grabbed him and hugged him with joy.

A sudden ripple in the water caught our attention. A face seemed to come out of the water. Saldowr!  
"Saldowr!" Gasped Faro.

The face of the dead Mer smiled at us and nodded as if he approved of our forgiveness of one another. Then he faded away into the water.

We gaped at where it had been for a few moments and then we were laughing and hugging again.

Faro suddenly stopped and held out his _deublek_.  
"For us to be brother and sister truly again we must both have a bracelet." He stated. He pulled out a lock of his hair and I did the same. Faro wove them in a complicated plait-like pattern. After he had finished he handed it to me and I instantly put it on.

We were now brother and sister again.

Faro and I dived into Ingo again. He used his Mer speed to swim ahead and called behind, laughing, "Don't be so slow little sister!"

So I sped up as fast as I could. If I'd stopped to look up I would maybe have noticed the shape of a barn owl flying above the water and rainbow in the sky.

But instead I was swimming along with Faro as fast as we could go. A whole world of adventure, fun and happiness lay before me like an open door. I had been re-initiated into this world of wonders. I was closer to Dad when I was here. Of course I'd return to Mum and Conor and Granny Carne and Rainbow and everyone else eventually.

Only for know this was where I wanted to be. I was in Ingo.

As we swam through the sea I saw light dancing through the water, shining on it in a dazzling way.

It was promising to be a beautiful day.

-The End- 


End file.
